Sean Beaudoin

Welcome Thieves

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“Funny and propulsive” short stories blending black humor and sharply intelligent imagination (Sam Lipsyte, author of The Fun Parts).
In twelve virtuosic stories, Sean Beaudoin trains his absurdist’s eye on the ridiculous perplexities of adult life. From muddling through after the apocalypse (“Base Omega Has Twelve Dictates”) to the knowing smirk of “You Too Can Graduate with a Degree in Contextual Semiotics,” Beaudoin’s stories are edgy and profane, bittersweet and angry, bemused and sardonic. Yet they’re always tinged with heart.
The author of Wise Young Fool, The Infects, and You Killed Wesley Payne follows in the tradition of Vonnegut and Saunders with “a deviously spellbinding collection of short stories,” filled with playfulness, pathos, and a variety of young protagonists struggling to adapt to the bizarre and sometimes brutal world of adulthood (Garth Stein).
“The character-driven tales are darkly comedic, filled with misfits like Primo and The Albatross, Danny and Steak, Sad Girl, Razr and Roy Boi, and Butterfly and Cher—characters so compelling that they are at once savage and powerless, redemptive and sardonic. . . . [They] fill the pages of Welcome Thieves, their complexities and frailties enough to recommend Beaudoin as a student and brilliant interpreter of human nature.” The Kansas City Star
“Thrilling and mercilessly readable, the stories in Welcome Thieves go off like a string of firecrackers, sizzling and popping with a narrative velocity that is equal parts grit and polish. Beaudoin is definitely a writer to watch.” —Jonathan Evison, author of This Is Your Life, Harriet Chance!
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206 printed pages
Original publication
2016

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Quotes

    Nicolas Palacioshas quoted2 years ago
    Torrentials have four songs. Three originals, which suck, and a cover of Thompson Twins’s “Hold Me Now,” which sucks.
    Nicolas Palacioshas quotedlast year
    Gabriel, it’s vital to remember that there’s absolutely nothing you couldn’t take 80 percent less seriously.

    Except possibly generalized statements involving percentages.
    Nicolas Palacioshas quotedlast year
    “Listen, thanks for coming,” Benny Winters says, grabs his shoulder exactly where the lifeguard did. Uncle Benny has silver eyebrows and Gatsby hair, smells like cologne made from orphans’ tears

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