I would never, ever wish the painful things that have happened to me on anyone else, but I have learned from some of them. I look at my mum and dad’s lives and can see that certain behavioural traits have been passed down through the generations. I don’t know whether this is to do with nature or nurture, or a combination of both. I know the abused can become abusers, and in my parents’ case that was true. However, I strongly believe this doesn’t have to be the case. The cycle can be broken. My own children have grown up free of the terrible consequences of physical or sexual abuse. They have also grown up in a secure environment of love. I feel confident that this will also be the case when my own children become parents